How do you keep your child safe and entertained?

Parents should spend as much time as possible with their children. However, some choose controversial activities or attractions for themselves and their children. Is it a good idea to take your toddler to a big concert or festival? Is riding a quad bike the right kind of entertainment for a child of a few years old? Katarzyna Oleksek spoke about this with Daria Jaorska, a child psychiatrist.

With the child to the concert

Agnieszka is a mother of two pre-school children. Women want to take their sons to a big concert in the summer. – I think that’s a great idea. We listen to music during the day, I know the boys love the band’s songs we’ll be attending. I am sure it will be great – she said in an interview with Dziendobry.tvn.pl.

When asked if she was concerned about safety, she replied that she had thought about it well and that she would buy a so-called child seat belt. – Only in this way will I be able to keep the children close to me and not get lost in the crowds – added Aniszka.

The woman added that if her husband agreed to leave, her mother would want to dissuade her from this idea at any cost. – In her opinion, the boys are too young to go to the concert. He thinks it’s dangerous and the boys won’t remember much about the prom and we and them will get tired. I think she hopes to change my mind, but I’m sure – she said.

How do you spend time safely with your child?

Katarzyna Oleksik: Is it a good idea to take young children to parties with a loud, a lot of people? How could this affect the child?

Daria Jaorska, child psychologist: It is difficult to answer this question unequivocally. Of course, it is not a good idea to take your child to a crowded club, where it is stuffy, noisy, smoking and difficult to find space for the child, it is not a good idea, it even seems unsafe. However, a concert in a large hall or in the open air is another thing, since the organizers themselves often allow the presence of children, and even organize friendly areas for them. I know parents who participate in such events from the first years of their lives.

So there’s nothing wrong with that?

Taking the child to a rock concert or a major sporting event, for example, a match or a highway, should be well thought out and fully adapted to the capabilities of the child. It can be a difficult experience for a very sensitive young child, but there are children who enjoy with their parents this situation.

If we really want to take the child to such an event, then we should start preparing for it in advance. My advice is to introduce your child gradually and start with events organized specifically for children. It will be a great opportunity to observe the baby and see how it reacts to different stimuli. If we notice that a large number of people are confusing our child – it will not be a good idea to go to the concert.

However, if the child gets used to it, it can be a great time. Let’s also take care of his hearing. Let’s get mute headphones. Let’s not approach the stage with the child. It should also be remembered that going to such a party requires logistics and taking many things with you. We also have to prepare for any eventuality – the child suddenly announces that he must go to the bathroom. We must also take food and drink with us, because we will not give the child sausage from a stall or a casserole.

However, there are times when parents fantasize. For example, they let young children ride quad bikes. This is very dangerous and sometimes such rides end in an accident.

Parents sometimes act on impulse, and even though they don’t want to, accidents do happen. Only after the fact comes the thought and the question “Where is my head?” Sometimes this inattention from parents comes from the fact that they are subject to certain fashions and trends and like to adapt a lot, show that they are great parents, and are “up to date”. There are also parents who, under the pretext of showing something to their children, are already fulfilling their childhood dreams.

It must also be said that we often give in to the children themselves. Because somewhere in someone they saw something and they also want it. Of course, there is nothing wrong with a parent buying a drone for their kids or taking them on a quad bike, it is important to use common sense and the ability to center certain things. The use of various devices requires adherence to certain rules. The role of parents is to obey them and control what the child does. Exceeding the limits leads to consequences – often unpleasant.

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How to choose safe entertainment for a child?

So how do you choose safe entertainment for a child? What should a parent think about if he wants to please the child?

Let’s listen to the voice of reason and intuition but also take into account the opinion of the child and do not forget to stimulate the imagination. What is attractive and popular is not always safe at the same time. Remember, we are not born knowing how to raise a child. We learn about parenting, and thus mature and change, we each have different experiences and are guided by different values. There are parents who are very protective and avoid all threats, and there are also parents who are very light in their upbringing, which allows them to have a lot. Neither of these extremes is considered good. Let us remember that we are the ones who show the child the world and the magic of life, but we also set boundaries, set the rules of behavior, teach what is safe and what is not.

How would you act in a situation where our partner wants to take our child, say a concert or ride a quad bike, and we just don’t agree?

Oftentimes, parents present different styles of parenting and perceive a particular situation in a different way. For one, a quad bike will be a great threat, for another – great entertainment. However, it must be remembered that the responsibility for the safety of the child, decisions and the course of the situation – always rests with adults. So let the decision to buy a quad bike be the decision of both parents. Responsibility is also the ability to speak constructively, analyze facts, and resolve conflicts. However, the potentially difficult situation when parents argue about the decision to consent to a risky activity can be a fruitful lesson for the child, as we teach dialogue and work on a common solution – for example, choosing safer equipment or another activity. So let’s try to look at this situation a little differently – we can argue about our arguments or teach a child how hard the art is to come to a compromise.

How do we dissuade our partner from such an idea?

Communication is the key to success. It is very important to develop a certain style of communication based on openness, acceptance, and willingness to understand at the beginning of the relationship. It is also worth setting some rules regarding the life, health and safety of the child in advance. Although this will not make the parents agree with each other on every issue, it will definitely help them find a compromise and help them overcome the predicament.

What about the emotions of the parents? Does he show it to the boy? If so, when do you start taming a child with them?

Definitely! Participating in cultural or sporting events can be a great way to spend time together. Thanks to this, the child experiences and learns new things with the closest people. I remember my son, when he was a few years old, humming the lyrics to a rock song while playing with cars. It is great for parents to show their children their passion, but remember that what we like, our child does not have to like. Think of it as an opportunity to learn and show your child that we are different and that we all have different interests. After all, we want a child to live his life – not ours.

Main image source: svetikd / Getty Images

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